Happy 'belated' Easter!

The front of their Card

The back of their card

I couldn't ask for more!

I have been having so many mixed emotions lately about my sweet little princess growing up! One minute, I feel like I am wishing that she was potty-trained and independent and the next I want to swaddle her and have her snuggle up on my chest like she did the first six months of her life. Why is it that I find myself always looking forward or looking back? Why can't I just live in each minute and ENJOY what life IS right now?!?

I have recently heard a couple of heart wrenching stories about tragic situations people are facing with their children. I am sure they only wish that their big delimma for the day was whether or not their baby should be off the bottle. Or when is the right time to transition to a big girl bed. I know they only WISH these were their concerns. And one day they were, and I am sure they NEVER thought they would be faced with the situations they are going through. We never know what God has planned for the next day. Maybe it's great, maybe it's not... but either way, we are assured that GOD is in control of it. HE has it planned out perfectly and all for HIS glory!

So, my prayer now is to enjoy the present! The more I try to plan the more un-needed stress I bring to my life. I am not sure what life will be like in 5 months when #2 has arrived. I am not sure how Alexa will do transitioning into a new bed. I am not sure if she will miss her morning bottle. I am not sure what the next hour will hold. But, I am sure that RIGHT NOW I am happy. Right now, my baby girl is more perfect than ever. Right now, every kick and subtle movement I feel in my tummy makes me smile. Right now, God has blessed me with such an amazing husband and father of my babies. Right now, my hope and my faith lie in Jesus Christ. And, I couldn't ask for more!

Everyday that passes is a gift. I want to live for each day. I want to teach my children to be CONTENT with life in the present.... WHATEVER it may be. It is ok for me to look back on sweet memories of Alexa as a newborn, or to look forward with sweet anticipation on what life will be like in the future, but I don't want to dwell. I want to be perfectly content with where God has me RIGHT NOW! Because I am here for a reason!

Welcome Back!

WOW!!! Its been FOREVER since I have taken the time to update this blog. Not sure if I ever really had any faithful followers, but if I did, I am sure they gave up on me a long time ago! So why and I coming back?!? A few reasons.... 1). I feel like I NEVER take the time to just sit and reflect. I want to challenge myself to document all of the sweet memories we are making as a family. I want Alexa and baby #2 to have their lives documented so they can one day go back and hear stories first hand from their mommy! 2). I have heard of people making books out of their blogs. What a neat memory to have!

So A LOT has happened since September when I last took the time to blog.

We found out in January that we were expecting Walker baby #2! SUPRRISE!!!! For those of you who do not know, Jonathan and I went through fertility treatments to get pregnant with Alexa. I have a few medical issues that were causing problems, so we were told by a Fertility Specialist that we had a 1% chance of conceiving a baby naturally. So after a lot of prayer, we decided to go through ONE round of fertility. By God's grace, we got pregnant with Alexa. So, needless to say, we did not think we would EVER get pregnant on our own. We had honestly come to terms that Alexa may be our one and only baby! When I told Jonathan I thought I may be pregnant with another baby he laughed at me. He thought I was just trying to come up with an excuse as to why I did not want to run on the treadmill anymore. I really did not think it was possible, but somewhere deep in my heart, I felt like it was really happening. One morning, I decided I would just go to Walgreens, buy a pregnancy test, and ease my mind from the curiousity. I went and took the test, and started to make Alexa breakfast. About a minute later, I just glanced down at the test and the word "PREGNANT" was staring me in the face. I immediately started crying. I have to admit, I am not sure where the tears were stemming from... some excitment and joy, but I was completely OVERWHELMED and shocked!!! I picked up the phone and called Jonathan. He was in a meeting and I am actually surprised he even answered the phone. I could barely get the words out through all of the tears. Being the AMAZING husband he is, he was so excited and supportive. He kept telling me there was no reason to cry. I believe his exact words were, "Baby, what a BLESSING! We are going to be a family of FOUR now! That is so awesome!". I hung up the phone wondering how in the world he could be soooooo calm about this! I million thoughts were running through my mind... HOW am I going to do this? HOW can I handle two kids under the age of 2? HOW is Alexa going to feel? HOW can we afford this when I am a stay at home mom? I can not say I felt a peace about the situation that day (even after my sister counseled me all day), or even that week, but it did not take long for me to realize that "I" am not going to be able to do any of it. BUT, through God's grace HE will get me through it all! HE will provide the time, energy, money, and everything else we will need to do it! Although WE had not planned for this baby, HE did! HE is in control and HIS plan is far greater than any I could make for myself. We could not feel more blessed and excited about our new addition. I know it will be an amazing thing for Alexa to have a sibiling so close in age (19 months apart). I can not wait to see what we will learn from this sweet baby! So, September 27th, 2010, we will be welcoming baby #2!!!!

In February, our baby girl turned ONE!!!! I still can not believe how fast the first year went!!! It just seems like a whirlwind! She has grown into such a little GIRL! No longer my baby! She has such a fun personality!! She loves music, loves to dance, play outside, eat, blow bubbles, torment Lucy dog, give kisses, be tickeled, and just giggle!! She is so full of life!!! Its so refreshing, I just wish I had a third of her energy!!!! Since January, she has been sick so much with ear infection after ear infection. Even throuh all of her illness, she ALWAYS had a smile on her face. The doctor's do not believe me when I tell them she is sick because she is so smiley and happy at every appointment. It would just amaze me that she could be so happy when you know she just felt miserable. On Friday, we finally had tubes put in her ears! By Saturday, she was even more wild and crazy than before!!!! I guess she was holding back a bit while she did not feel good! She has started saying more words all of a sudden. She says "HI" in the sweetest, soft voice I have every heard. Its so fun to walk in her room to get her out of her bed and hear her say "HI" and give me a big smile!!! What an amazing way to start the day! She also says "more", "thank you", "out", "cracker" (I told you she likes food!!), "up", "mama", "dada", and there are more but of course I can not think of them all! She is getting so much more independent. She thinks she needs to walk everywhere and does not need to hold your hand. She can do it all by herself. She can entertain herself so well. Its so fun to watch the things she does and how maticulious she is. Last week, she went through the toy box and found all 4 of her pig stuffed animals. She very stratigicly placed each pig in a perfect line on the floor. They would fall over, and she would patiently stand it back up and they go grab another one. It is so funny to watch her as she really put a lot of thought into each move. This, she definitely gets from her daddy! This age is so much fun because they are just like little sponges. They are soaking up every bit of knowledge that you provide and really "get it" more than you realize. She surprises me often with how much she really knows that I do not give her credit for. She is just such a joy!!! Jonathan and I could not be more proud of the little girl she is turning into!!! We pray that as she continues to grow, she would have a heart after God's own will. I pray for the friends she will make and choose to hang out with. I pray that she would always put God first and seek His guidance in every decision she makes. I pray for the man that God has created for her... that He would protect both of their hearts and keep them whole until He has them unite and become one. I pray that WE would seek God in every parenting decision that we make and that it would all be for HIS glory! We have been blessed so abundantly and our life has been forever enriched by His precious gift!

Sorry for the novel... if I would update this thing more than once every 7 months, maybe I would not have so much to share!!! Sadly, I could go on for hours! Please hold me accountable to keep this blog up for the sake of the memories it will hold for my sweet babies!